Over the past year, I took a TV writing course as a part of my MFA in Creative Writing through the University of British Columbia. During that course, we studied the art of writing teleplays, and during the course we produced a spec script, and an original pilot spec. A spec script is a TV writer's calling card, as it is what shows the agents and TV execs that you can actually write, and write well. A spec is a script is also based on an existing television show, and the reason for this is that if you can show that you have captured the tone and feel of a show that is not yours, then you can theoretically write for any show.
I don't believe I'll ever be a TV writer, as much as I'd like to be, because family commitments prevent me from trying to climb that ladder. But still, I found I enjoyed writing this form.
What follows is not fan fiction, I want to be clear about that, but is my own original spec script for the show Monk.
EXT. SAN FRANCISCO - UNKNOWN STREET - DAY
Natalie, Randy and stottlemeyer stand at a door. Natalie knocks. The door opens.
HOMEOWNER
Can I help you?
Natalie holds up a picture of Monk.
NATALIE
Have you seen this man? He might have passed by sometime in the past 24 hours?
The Homeowner shakes his head.
HOMEOWNER
No. Sorry.
He closes the door. The three walk to the side walk. Natalie sits on the curb. She puts her head in her hands.
NATALIE
This is so crazy. Where did he go?
She is crying. Randy puts his hand on her shoulder.
RANDY
We'll find him. I promise.
STOTTLEMEYER
Natalie, you've been at this since yesterday. You need some rest. Come on, I'll take you home. We've got every man on the force looking. He'll turn up somewhere.
INT. SUNNYLAND COMMON ROOM - MOMENTS LATER
Monk enters into the common room. Isaac is across the room. Isaac waves at Monk and points at a table.
ISAAC
There you are! Where've you been hiding!
Monk pauses. He waves hesitantly.
MONK
Um...hello!
ISAAC
Well? What are you waiting for? I got your lunch for you right here!
Monk walks over to Isaac. On the table there are two lunch trays. They are both identical. All of the food has been separated into neat piles. Isaac points at the food.
ISAAC (CONT'D)
I thought I'd try it your way. It's not bad! Thank you!
MONK
Thank you?
ISAAC
Remember? You said I'd thank you for it later, and I am!
Monk smiles and sits down.
MONK
Actually, I think that's the first time that's ever happened.
ISAAC
What's happened?
MONK
That someone has thanked me for it later. I always say 'you'll thank me for it later' but no one ever does. Thank me for it. Later.
Monk coughs.
ISAAC
Really? Well they should have. Hey! What happened with you last night? I heard you got into a bit of a scrap.
MONK
No. I just wanted to leave. But then that Nurse was there, with a needle? What is it with this place and needles?
ISAAC
Needles? I don't know. I haven't had a shot since coming here. Come to think of it, they don't even give me any medication at all.
MONK
None? At all?
ISAAC
Nope. No need for it. There's nothing wrong with me!
MONK
Nothing wrong with you? But that can't be right. Why would you be here?
ISAAC
Oh! Well, it was my aunt, really. She said I was driving her crazy, and thought this place would help me, you know, be a little more normal.
MONK
So let me get this straight. You annoy your aunt, so she sends you to a psychiatric hospital.
ISAAC
It's not so unusual.
MONK
Yes it is.
ISAAC
Not here. Look around here. Do most of these guys look crazy to you?
Monk looks around the room. Some patients are reading books. A few are having a quiet card game. Three or four are watching the news. Others quietly chatting or eating their food.
MONK
No. No they don't.
Monk spots a patient arranging the vertical blinds strangely.
MONK (CONT'D)
Except for him. What's he doing?
ISAAC
Who? Leo? He likes to arrange things around here. He's like our decorator.
MONK
Where did he learn to decorate? Everything's...wrong.
ISAAC
Wrong? How?
MONK
What do you mean how? Just look? It's all...uneven. Some are open, some are closed. There's not even a pattern there. You know what, maybe I can help him fix it.
ISAAC
Uh...I don't think that's such a good idea. He get's pretty sensitive about his arrangements.
MONK
I'm sure he won't mind.
Monk stands up and walks over to where the vertical blinds begin, and starts setting them all in the open position. Leo is ahead of him some way, and doesn't see what Monk is doing. Isaac walks up to Monk.
ISAAC
He's going to get mad when he sees this.
MONK
For what? Fixing the blinds? He'll thank me later.
ISAAC
I don't know about that.
Isaac trails Monk. Monk methodically opens each blind.
LEO (O.S.)
Hey! What are you doing!
ISAAC
See! I told you.
Monk turns and sees Leo running across the room toward him.
LEO
Stop it! What are you doing? You're ruining everything!
MONK
Ruining?
Leo runs to where the blinds begin, and reorients them. Monk moves forward, opening more blinds. They both move faster and faster. They stare at each other like gunfighters.
LEO
Stop it!
MONK
No, you stop it!
LEO
You're ruining the pattern!
ISAAC
I told you.
MONK
What pattern! There is no pattern!
Monk is now on the other side of the room. Leo catches up with him and they start struggling over one blind.
MONK (CONT'D)
(Grunting)
You'll...thank...me...later
LEO
No! You philistine! You destroyer!
MONK
Destroy what? There is no pattern!
LEO
Zero, one, one, two, three, five, eight, thirteen, twenty one!
Monk's hands slip. He falls against the window.
LEO (CONT'D)
Ha!
MONK
A Fibonacci sequence? That's your pattern?
Monk looks across the room. He sees the pattern. Then Monk looks at Isaac, who is looking out the window, waving.
MONK (CONT'D)
Who uses a Fibonacci sequence?
LEO
Philistine! Simpleton!
Isaac looks over and smiles.
ISAAC
Don't worry about Leo. He'll go away soon. Just don't mess up the blinds.
Leo huffs. He gives Monk a strong glare, then leaves.
MONK
Who are you waving at?
ISAAC
Oh! My aunt. She's out there with her group?
MONK
Your aunt is there? Not visiting you?
ISAAC
Oh no. She sees me once a month. But she's meeting her group now.
Monk looks out the window. He sees a large group of old women having tea on the lawn. Doctor Randall is with them. A nurse is passing out gifts, and collecting envelopes.
MONK
Is it a birthday?
ISAAC
No? Why?
MONK
Why are they giving out gifts?
ISAAC
Beats me! Just something they do every week.
MONK
Every week?
ISAAC
Yep. They come in like a storm, talk to Doctor Randall, and leave! All sunshine a light. That Doctor Randall sure is a miracle worker.
Monk's face lights up.
ISAAC (CONT'D)
What?
MONK
I think I've solved the case!
ISAAC
The case? You mean Ken?
MONK
Yes. And here's what happened.
Monk walks away from the window. The other patients in the room are now looking at Monk.
MONK (CONT'D)
When I met Mrs. Casey, she seemed distraught. She believed her son had been murdered, but wouldn't say why. When we came to Sunnyland, her mood changed, she was irritable, angry. But then she seemed desperate to see Doctor Randall. Like she needed something.
ISAAC
Like what?
MONK
When I was in the lobby, I saw that group of women. They were all angry, and agitated, and waiting to meet Doctor Randall also.
ISAAC
He is pretty popular.
MONK
Yes, but why? That's the question. And now I see it clearly. You're not here because you're sick. Neither was Ken, or a number of people here. You are all here, because one way or another, you were convinced it would be for your benefit to be here. But the real benefit wasn't to you at all, it was to them.
Monk points out the window, at the group of women. Doctor Randall is not there.
ISAAC
What benefit?
MONK
A place like this would normally be very expensive. Except...
ISAAC
Except what?
MONK
Except if payment was by a different method.
ISAAC
Like what?
MONK
You said they come in like a storm, and leave like sunshine a light. Well there was a good reason for that. Those gifts they're being given, there not gifts they're merchandise. Maybe Oxycontin, or some sort of mood changing anti-depressant.
Those weekly meetings with Doctor Randall weren't meetings with their doctor, they were meetings with their dealer. He gives them their weekly fix. They use it and sell it, and come back each week for some more.
ISAAC
Are you saying my aunt's a drug dealer?
MONK
And Doctor Randall is their supplier. That's what happened to Ken. He figured out what happened, but before he could leave and blow the whistle, he was murdered. Most of the patients here aren't taking medication, and I'm willing to bet he wasn't either. Someone else gave him the overdose.
DOCTOR RANDALL (O.S.)
And who would that be?
Monk turns around. Doctor Randall is standing there. Two orderlies grab Monk.
DOCTOR RANDALL (CONT'D)
Quite a story, Mr. Johnson! Or should I say, Mr. Monk? Isn't that what you keep calling yourself? San Francisco's greatest detective?
MONK
You. You're the guy. You murdered Ken to keep your scam a secret. And you were planning on getting rid of me. But now everybody in this room knows your little secret, Doctor. And you can't kill us all.
DOCTOR RANDALL
I'm sorry to say it's all a figment of your disturbed imagination. I see my work has failed thus far, Mr. Johnson. Not to worry, I'm not giving up on you.
Doctor Randall motions to the orderlies.
DOCTOR RANDALL (CONT'D)
Take him away.
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